When someone says emphatically, “Never again!” or “That’s it!” or “I’ve had it!” (usually accompanied by some kind of definitive slicing hand gesture) that indicates that they have reached a threshold, and are ready to take action to make a change in their lives. However, they may reach this threshold, take action, and then continue in the same habit, relationship, or other behavior. But after doing this repeatedly a certain number of times, they may go over the threshold, which is very different than reaching it. After that, the habit, relationship, or other behavior becomes “A thing of the past,” and “There is no turning back.”
This pattern, which we described in chapter 6 of Change Your Mind—and Keep the Change can be used to help someone congruently make a significant change in their lives when other patterns have not been successful. It was modeled by Richard Bandler in the early 1980s.
This demonstration of eliciting these patterns for a client by Connirae and Steve Andreas was conducted in a Master Practitioner Training in late 1986. The technical quality is typical of recordings made at that time, but the content is excellent. 60 minutes.
Here is a sample clip:
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